The pledgees of Zeta Phi Beta sorority have been given an assignment by their big sisters.
ADA - B, it doesn't matter if you think its silly and stupid, we still have to do it.
MIYA - Phi, why? Nobody is here!
LAUREL - Sigma, just shut up and do it.
MIYA - Phi, you shut up!
(LAUREL slams down the bowl she is mixing in. She turns to face MIYA.)
LAUREL - Sigma, I am sick and tired of your crap okay!
MIYA - Phi, well do something about it then!
TAMMI - Z, wait wait wait!
(TAMMI steps between MIYA and LAUREL who are staring each other down but neither making a move.)
TAMMI - Z, yall are getting ridiculous! Look at what time it is and look at how much we still have to do! Now come on and stop being stupid!
MIYA - And why the hell are we still saying Z, Phi, B, and Sigma! They aint here!
ADA - B, we might as well stay in the practice of doing it. The more we say it the more it becomes memory. You know repitition is the mother of memory.
MIYA - And you're about to be the aunt of getting on my nerves.
(ADA gives MIYA a glance, then returns to her measuring and pouring.)
TAMMI - Z, look, we only have a little bit of time left and we gotta get this food prepared.
ADA - B, actually how much time do we have left? Do we really know? When are they coming back?
MIYA - Yeah, how do we know when they're supposed to come back?
ADA - You better say Phi when you speak number two.
MIYA - Okay fine! I mean Phi! Oh whatever! How do we know when they're supposed to be back? How much time do we have?
LAUREL - Sigma, they went to a wedding. Big brother Miri had his wedding today.
ADA - B, oh that's right!
TAMMI - Z, yeah but what time did it start?
LAUREL - Sigma, probably about two hours ago. They should be in the reception by now.
MIYA - Phi, how do we know that they are all going to the reception?
LAUREL - Sigma, we don't.
(silence)
LAUREL - Sigma, all the more reason we need to hurry our asses up and get this cake done and the rest of this food done.
(They get back to cooking.)
LAUREL - Sigma, especially you Miya!
MIYA - What!
ADA - B, say Phi!
MIYA - Shut up! What?
LAUREL - Sigma, you the only one complaining, bitchin' and moaning, but you doin' the least amount of work!
MIYA - Phi! That aint true! You see me here working on this tray!
LAUREL - Sigma! you been workin' on that tray for forty minutes! At the same time, I done finished three trays, number one finished like five already and even four has finished a couple! What is taking you so long?
MIYA - Phi, I aint no cook alright! My mom cooks for me so I don't have to and I never learned!
LAUREL - Sigma! How hard is it to mix cake batter? I mean damn! If you stop your lips from flappin' maybe we can get somewhere with all this shit!
MIYA - Phi! Maybe if you'd get off my case and stop lookin' over everybody's shoulder every five minutes... you aint a big sister and you can't tell me shit!
LAUREL - Sigma! I might as well be your big sister because your young ass is still in high school!
MIYA - Phi! I bet my young ass is more mature than you! I'm more woman then you'll ever be and more man then you'll ever get!
LAUREL - What! Bitch please!
MIYA - Ph... who you callin' a bitch!
ADA - Hey! Hey! Hey! Ladies!
(silence)
LAUREL - Okay okay everybody just...
(In a split second, LAUREL gets hit across the side of her face with a handfull of cake batter.)
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BRENDON runs into the Office of Student Life and Activities.
BRENDON thinks - Please be here! Please be here!
(He opens the door and sees a girl behind a desk.)
BRENDON thinks - Damn!
(He approaches the desk.)
RECEPTIONIST - Can I help you?
BRENDON - Uh yeah, is Sandy here today?
RECEPTIONIST - Yeah, she just stepped out and I'm covering the phone for her. She'll be back in a... oh here she is.
(SANDY walks in and sees BRENDON turn around. She sucks her teeth as she passes him to walk behind the desk.)
BRENDON - Hey San, how you doin'?
SANDY - Boy you know you got some nerve coming up in here talkin' to me.
(She sits down as the RECEPTIONIST gets up to leave.)
SANDY - Thanks girl.
RECEPTIONIST - No problem.
(The RECEPTIONIST giggles as she walks from behind the desk, passes BRENDON and leaves the office.)
BRENDON - Aw come on Sandy, why you mad at me.
(He pouts.)
SANDY - Naw Bren, that aint gonna work this time. I am too through with you and I aint foolin' with you no more.
BRENDON - Come on Sandy, I meant to call you but I been crazy busy.
SANDY - Tell it to the next chick Brendon. I know you aint been busy. You just a player. You probably still chillin' with Donna.
BRENDON - Donna? Girl please I aint thinkin' bout her. But look, forget all that. I need your help Sandy.
(She sits back and mimicks a look of shock.)
SANDY - Oh now you need my help! You don't call, you stand me up, you practically ignore me on the yard when I walk by, but now you need me!
BRENDON thinks - God!
BRENDON - Don't do me like that Sandy baby. I'll make it up to you this time, I promise.
SANDY - Whatever. Can you excuse me I got some work I need to catch up on.
(She turns away from him and starts to type something on her computer.)
BRENDON - Okay Sandy listen...
(BRENDON leans in across her desk.)
BRENDON - This is serious...
(He whispers.)
BRENDON whispers - I'm not supposed ot tell you this but...
(He leans up, looks left and right, then leans back toward her.)
BRENDON whispers - I'm pledging right now and if you don't help me, me and my line brothers are gonna be in deep shit!
SANDY - You are?
(She turns from her computer and faces him quicly.)
BRENDON - Shhhhhhh! Not so loud!
(She leans down to whisper.)
SANDY whispers - You are? Seriously?
BRENDON whispers - Yeah.
(silence)
SANDY whispers - Oh shit... well um... what do you need Brendon honey?
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LAUREL - Ahhhhh!
(LAUREL's head flops back as the cake mix splatters all over her face. She is in shock and everyone jumps back as batter goes everywhere.)
ADA - Hey!
LAUREL - You little bitch! Come here!
(LAUREL takes a scoop of the nearest thing to her... potato salad and throws it at MIYA.)
MIYA - Ow!
ADA - Stop it! Stop i..
(ADA gets hit in the head with something cold and wet. It gets all in her hair.)
ADA - Oh no! No you didn't!
(She goes after LAUREL with a two eggs.)
LAUREL - Stop Ada! Stop!
(ADA throws one, LAUREL ducks and it hits the wall. She throws the other and it hits LAUREL.)
MIYA - Ha ha ha ha ha! That's what you...
(MIYA is slapped with a bowl full of dough.)
MIYA - Hey! I just got this shirt from the Gap!
TAMMI - Stop it! Dammit I said stop!
(TAMMI grabs LAUREL's arms.)
TAMMI - Look at yourselves! Look! What if the big sisters come in!
(That statement causes everyone to freeze. ADA has another egg she was ready to throw... MIYA has two hand fulls of cake batter...LAUREL was reaching for the potato salad.)
(silence)
TAMMI - What the hell is the matter with you fools! Look at this mess!
(Everyone starts to look around as if they didn't just see what caused the room and themselves to be a mess.)
TAMMI - Now look at what you guys have done! Now we gotta prepare all this damn food and clean up! What the hell is the matter with you all!
(silence)
(MIYA snickers and starts to laugh.)
TAMMI - This is not funny!
(MIYA starts to laugh louder because ADA is now laughing too. LAUREL looks at them both, smiles and starts to laugh herself.)
TAMMI - Oh fine fine! So now its all funny huh?
ADA - Come on Tammi, lighten up. We needed a stress reliever.
LAUREL - I'm sorry girl.
MIYA - Me too. I'm sorry.
(MIYA and LAUREL hug each other, avoiding the food plastered on them both.)
TAMMI - I don't like more work as a stress reliever! Personally I prefer about nine inches. That's my kind of stress reliever!
(ADA gasps.)
ADA - Tammi!
LAUREL - Hey, we got virgin ears in the room.
(LAUREL playfully closes MIYA's ears.)
MIYA - Who you callin' a virgin? Girl please!
LAUREL - Whoa!
(Everyone laughs with MIYA.)
LAUREL - I guess you hangin' with the big girls huh Miya?
MIYA - That's right!
(Everyone laughs.)
MIYA - And for the record, I don't mess with no nine inch brothers! Its eleven and up for me!
(That comment causes the room to erupt into hilarious laughter, including MIYA.)
LAUREL - Damn girl! You better than me!
(LAUREL grabs a wooden spoon and tries to measure eleven inches.)
LAUREL - Shit! Eleven inches? This shit is almost as tall as Ada! Come here one!
ADA - Keep that thing away from me!
(They all laugh.)
TAMMI - Look yall, its a good thing we know the big sisters are gonna be tied up with this wedding for a while because if they found this mess they would have our ass! So let's finish this meal for the homeless and clean up this place like this all never happened.
ADA - Good idea. Let's have two of us start to clean up while the other two finish with the food.
MIYA - Phi! Good idea!
(Everyone laughs.)
LAUREL - Yeah. Good thing big sisters are gonna be gone for a while!
MIYA - Yeah!
TAMMI - Z. And from now on if we...
(The door opens and in walks KIM and LEAH.)
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JAHANNA and GREGG are in JAHANNA's room... kissing passionately.
JAHANNA thinks - Oh my God I can't believe this is happening! Oh my God!
JAHANNA - Do you know how bad I want you?
GREGG - No, show me.
(They both smile.)
JAHANNA - Lay back.
(GREGG rolls off of JAHANNA and rolls over to his back.)
GREGG thinks - Is she gonna...
(silence)
GREGG thinks - Oh shit she is gonna...
(GREGG folds his hands behind his head and looks up at the ceiling. JAHANNA is licking down his stomach toward his belt. She starts to unfasten his belt.)
GREGG thinks - Let's see if she got skills!
(GREGG lifts his hips to assist JAHANNA in taking his jeans off. She stops and sits up.)
JAHANNA - What kind of underwear is this Gregg? Hearts?
GREGG - You know how it is, its laundry day!
(They both laugh as she pulls his pants off his legs, one leg at a time. She starts to lick right above his waistband.)
JAHANNA - Mmmmmmm.
GREGG - Go head girl, do your thing.
(He lifts his hips again as she slides his shorts off.Her eyes open with surprise.)
JAHANNA thinks - Damn!
JAHANNA - Wow... I see what you workin' with.
(She takes it in her hand, GREGG just smiles arrogantly.)
JAHANNA thinks - Gosh, I see why Shareesa couldn't leave him! Dag!
(She licks it up the side and he closes his eyes. She looks at him for approval, but after getting none, she looks back down at it and takes it in her mouth.)
DEXTER - Hey, thanks for coming PJ. I know you can talk some sense into her ass.
PJ - No problem man. And thanks for confiding in me. I didn't even know she had feelings for Gregg at all.
DEXTER - She aint got feelings for that motherfucker, he just messin' with her mind.
PJ - Well I aint surprised to hear that shit. That negro is shady!
(DEXTER and PJ get off the elevator and walk toward JAHANNA's room.)
DEXTER - I knew I should've beat his cat ass while I had the chance! Fuckin' with my sister!
PJ - Naw, you did the right thing Dex. You know how things get here on campus. You and Gregg go at it, the next thing you know Ronnie and Big Mike get involved, then its a war.
DEXTER - Yeah, true. The bruhs get in and shit is over!
PJ - We gotta somehow stop all this fightin' and shit. It don't make no sense.
(DEXTER looks at PJ funny.)
DEXTER - And this coming from you?
(He laughs.)
PJ - Okay okay, I know I've been known to go a round or two. But I'm a changed woman.
DEXTER - Yeah right!
(He laughs again.)
PJ - I'm serious man, I'm turning over a new leaf.
DEXTER - Well good for you. What brought about your change?
(PJ thinks about TRINA.)
(silence)
PJ - Nothing in particular.
DEXTER - I hear ya.
PJ - But from now on, I take things calm cool and collected. Ya know? I don't get all hyped out and excited. No more yelling and screaming.
DEXTER - Well that's good shit!
PJ - Yep. From now on, PJ is cool, no matter what she runs into.
(PJ knocks on JAHANNA's door.)
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BRENDON is asking SANDY for her help.
BRENDON whispers - I'm pledging right now and if you don't help me, me and my line brothers are gonna be in deep shit!
SANDY - You are?
BRENDON - Shhhhhhh! Not so loud!
(She leans down to whisper.)
SANDY whispers - You are? Seriously?
BRENDON whispers - Yeah.
SANDY whispers - Oh shit... well um... what do you need Brendon honey?
BRENDON whispers - Look, I really would've called you and hooked up with you. But I been pledging and trying to get into the frat. But you know I do like you Sandy. I do.
(She smiles.)
SANDY - Nuh uh... you just sayin' that. You like me for real Brendon?
BRENDON - Come on girl, you know I like big girls.
BRENDON thinks - Lord help me!
SANDY - So we gonna go out after you cross?
BRENDON - I would take you out tonight if I wasn't pledgin'! I know you like to eat.
(He laughs at his own joke quietly. She smiles.)
SANDY - Stop playin! You so silly! So what you need me to do?
(He reaches into his pocket.)
BRENDON - Look baby, I really need you to do a few things for me. I know you can do it which is why I came by. If you do this, I will owe you big time, but believe me, I will make it up in a big way!
SANDY - You better!
BRENDON - I need the things on this list done. Now I can do a few, but I know you can do the computer stuff for me.
SANDY - Let me see.
BRENDON - Check this out, I gotta create a new logo for the band. And we got a battle of the bands coming up and I gotta create a flier for that. But if you can do the logo, you can just incorporate it into a flier.
SANDY - Okay, that's easy enough.
BRENDON - Also, I gotta create stickers. You can use the logo for that, and then I gotta create booster sheets. Like sign in forms, with the logo also.
SANDY - That aint much because you're using the same logo.
BRENDON - See, you know better than me. I knew you could handle it.
SANDY - Oh yeah, I can knock this out. As a matter of fact, I may have some templates on my computer that I can use.
BRENDON - Bless you!
SANDY - Shut up silly!
(She smiles.)
SANDY - So which frat are you pledging?
(silence)
BRENDON - Why don't you wait and be surprised like everyone else is gonna be.
(SANDY starts to clap her hands and bounce up and down in her seat.)
SANDY - Ooooh! I love it! I can't wait to find out!
(BRENDON laughs, then checks his watch.)
BRENDON - Okay um, how long do you think it will take for you to knock those things out?
SANDY - Oh you need it right now?
(He smiles.)
SANDY - Brendon I'm gonna kill your ass!
(He smiles harder.)
BRENDON - Like I said, I'll make it up to ya.
SANDY - And I know how too... but I'll keep my surprise a surprise too!
BRENDON thinks - God what am I getting myself into!
SANDY - Okay I'll try and knock it out right now.
BRENDON - Thank you thank you thank you!
SANDY - What else you got on that list?
BRENDON - Well um... I need to order some bandanas, with that logo.
SANDY - Oh I can do that too. We have a vendor that we use for student activities. They make all kinds of knick knacks and stuff. I know they got bandanas.
BRENDON - Oh great! Thanks! Well that's all you can do... actually wait, can you write a letter for me? We got a battle of the bands between us and Amgis that we are setting up. Can you write a letter to their band staff for me?
SANDY - Formal letter?
BRENDON - Yeah, has to have letterhead and everything. Just informing them of the date of the battle which is right here, and telling them what they need to have which is listed right here on the back.
SANDY -Well I do got letterhead right here. I'll just need for you to sign the names on the bottom because I don't know who it is to and who it is from.
BRENDON - That's fine. Sandy baby, you are a life saver for real!
SANDY - Um hmmmm, tell me anything.
(He signs the names that she needs and smiles as he turns to leave.)
BRENDON - Well look, let me run because I gotta take care of the things on this list that you can't do. But I'll call you in a little while to check up on ya.
SANDY - You still got my number right? Make sure cuz you gonna need it as soon as you cross!
BRENDON thinks - Lord help me!
BRENDON - Of course. Thanks again Sandy.
(She writes her number down. He takes it and turns to leave and opens the door.)
SANDY - Bren...
(He turns back.)
BRENDON - Yeah.
(SANDY smiles.)
SANDY - I think you need to start thanking me now.
BRENDON thinks - No!
BRENDON - Naw girl, I thank ya when you're done. That's how it works sweetheart.
SANDY - No, you thank me now or I don't do a thing. And that... is how it works... sweetheart.
(BRENDON smiles as he approaches her. He is trying to keep his smile. She stands up and opens her arms. She walks from behind the desk.)
SANDY - Good luck in pledging baby.
(BRENDON hugs SANDY and as he is trying to let go, she grabs his butt and squeezes.)
SANDY - Call me later, I'll have this stuff for ya then.
BRENDON - Uh...
(SANDY opens her mouth and pulls BRENDON close so their mouths meet. Her tongue pushes its way past his closed lips.)
BRENDON - What the fu.. mmmmphhh!
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GREGG - Oh! Oh! Oh shit!
(JAHANNA is working it as best she knows how. Then she stops.)
JAHANNA - Is it good? I don't really know how to do this.
GREGG - No no... don't stop... keep going.
(She smiles.)
JAHANNA - Okay.
(She starts to lick it again and he throws his head back onto the bed.)
GREGG - Oh! Oh!
GREGG thinks - Damn, she aint the best but it aint the worst either.
(He closes his eyes and imagines it is someone else doing it.)
GREGG - Use your hand too, like this...
(He takes her hand and shows her how to stroke it up and down. She catches on quick and obliges.)
GREGG - That's it. Yeah, that's how I like it.
GREGG thinks - Oh yes, that's better!
(He opens his eyes and picks his head up. He looks down at the top of her head moving up and down. He smiles and puts his head back down on the bed.)
GREGG thinks - Oh shit... oh shit... I'm about to cum...
GREGG - Wait wait wait...
(She stops and looks up with a worried look.)
JAHANNA - What's the matter?
GREGG - Nothing, I just don't want to cum yet and you makin' me... damn girl!
JAHANNA - Oh. Hee hee.
GREGG - Hold on, give me a second.
JAHANNA - Okay.
(She rolls from on top of him to next to him. He grabs her pants buckle and starts to unfasten them. She quickly helps him take off her pants.)
GREGG - Lay back.
(JAHANNA smiles.)
JAHANNA - Do you have protection?
(GREGG looks her dead in the face.)
GREGG - Um... naw but just lay back. I aint goin' there, I need to return the favor first.
JAHANNA thinks - Yes!
(She smiles as she leans back. She now lifts her hips so he can take her underwear off.)
GREGG - Just relax.
JAHANNA - Okay.
(GREGG pushes her legs open and licks her one time. She takes in a deep breath and arches her back.)
JAHANNA - Ohhhhh yes!
(GREGG smiles as he starts to lick her very vigorously.)
JAHANNA - Ohhhh that feels so good! Oh my God!
(There is a knock on the door. GREGG stops and looks up.)
JAHANNA thinks - Who the hell...
GREGG - Expecting company?
JAHANNA - Um... no.
GREGG - You wanna go see who it is?
JAHANNA - Um no!
(He laughs then places his face down between her legs again. There is another knock and this time it is harder.)
JAHANNA - Shit!
GREGG - Go make whoever it is go away.
JAHANNA - Aaaah!
(She sits up and jumps out of the bed quickly.)
JAHANNA thinks - Damn! Damn! Damn!
(She goes toward the door pulling up her pants quickly. There is another knock on the door. She looks back at GREGG and smiles. He thinks she is smiling because he is sexy. She is smiling at his look in just a shirt and socks. She tosses her shirt back on.)
JAHANNA - Alright alright I'm coming!
(She cracks the door open slightly, while standing behind it.)
PJ - Hey, let us in I need to talk to you.
(JAHANNA sees PJ and DEXTER standing behind her.)
JAHANNA - Uhhh, now isn't a good time you guys. Can you come back tomorrow?
PJ - Tomorrow? Girl please! What you doin'?
JAHANNA - I'm busy right now.
DEXTER - Open the door J. We really need to talk to you.
JAHANNA - I'll talk to yall, but not right now, I'm um... I really am tied up at the moment.
(PJ starts to push the door open.)
PJ - Shut up J, you aint doin' shit.
(DEXTER starts to laugh loudly as he follows PJ into JAHANNA's room. JAHANNA is pushing to keep the door closed but PJ is much stronger and easily pushes her way in.)
JAHANNA - No! Wait! I'm not dressed!
(PJ and DEXTER barge in.)
JAHANNA - No!
(PJ is laughing until she sees GREGG who is pulling his pants back up quickly.)
PJ - Gregg?
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